Emotionally-Focused Therapy (EFT) is often used to help individuals, couples, and even families repair attachment injuries and improve emotional bonds. People work with therapists to identify negative habits and patterns that hinder connection and communication and learn how to re-structure those relationships. 

While EFT is a wonderful way to rekindle a relationship, learn more about yourself, or strengthen your bond with your family, it can also be used as a form of grief counseling. 

Let’s dig a little deeper into how EFT-based grief counseling works, and how it might benefit you if you’re struggling with the loss of a loved one. 

The Problem With Grief

Almost everyone recognizes that there are different stages of grief. There’s no ideal timeline as to how quickly you will go through them. But, some people struggle with those stages more than others. 

No matter how long ago you lost a loved one, you might be asking yourself “What now?” Who are you without that person? Have you lost a part of yourself? Maybe you’ve even lost a sense of your identity. 

Essentially, grief delivers a blow to your emotional state. That’s where EFT comes in. Your goal should be to return to a healthy, normal life. That’s hard to do when you feel some kind of unresolved attachment issues with the person you lost. Maybe you were withholding the truth from them about something. Maybe your relationship was weakened because of a specific situation. Or, maybe you just didn’t tell them everything you always wanted. 

EFT can help you work through those attachment issues and move forward in your grieving process. 

woman sitting cross legged in a field surrounded by leavesWhen You’re Feeling Stuck

EFT can end up being a big help if you’re feeling “stuck” in one of the stages of grief. Your therapist will likely work with you to uncover any “blocks” in your attachments that could be keeping you from moving forward. 

Maybe you simply haven’t allowed yourself to fully let go. You might have kids at home that need you to be strong, or a spouse who is also grieving and relying on you for support. Whatever has you feeling stuck, EFT is designed to help you break free so you can continue to go through the grieving process in healthy ways. 

What to Expect From EFT Sessions

When you’re grieving the loss of someone, there’s a fine line between holding on and letting go. Your therapist will help you walk that line by holding your hand. EFT is about listening, sharing, interacting, and experiencing your emotions rather than trying to push them down or ignore them. 

One of the first things you’ll notice about EFT sessions is that they’re designed to be a safe, comfortable space where you can freely open up and know you’re not being judged in any way. 

Throughout your sessions, your therapist will guide you through some basic principles of emotional regulation associated with grief. You’ll learn how to acknowledge and identify your emotions. You’ll then learn about emotional regulation. 

Emotional regulation is important when you’re struggling with grief. It’s not uncommon for grieving individuals to deal with “triggers” and social settings that can make them feel worse. Regulation will help you deal with those situations in healthy, effective ways. 

Eventually, you’ll transform your feelings of grief into something acceptance and renewed energy for life. 

Why EFT is Different and Effective

EFT isn’t designed to help you “forget” about your loss. When you shift your perspective from negative to positive, you’re not denying the weight of your loss, either. Rather, you’ll be able to reframe the way you see the loss, and look back fondly on the person you loved while enjoying a full and satisfying life. 

Reach out to me at 561/866-6607 to learn more about the benefits of Emotionally Focused Therapy.