Communication is the cornerstone of a healthy relationship. That doesn’t mean you need to agree on everything, and it doesn’t mean you have to have the exact same communication style as your partner. 

What it should mean, however, is that you and your partner make healthy communication a priority. 

Unfortunately, many people struggle with that. If those communication issues aren’t addressed and improved, it can lead to lingering problems within your relationship. 

Thankfully, it’s often easier to improve communication than you might think. Let’s cover four effective ways you can start to make positive communicative changes in your relationship right away.

1. Don’t Be a Mind Reader

One of the biggest mistakes couples often make is assuming what their partner is thinking or feelings. This is especially common in relationships where there are communication issues already. 

If you’re not open with each other, it can make you more prone to assumptions. The problem with assumptions is that they’re not based in reality. You’re not a mind reader and neither is your partner. It’s not fair to either of you to try to determine what the other is thinking or feeling without directly asking. Doing so can lead to arguments, confusion, or even resentment.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

So, what can you do to stop assuming? Ask better questions! It’s easy to ask someone how their day was, but you’re likely to be met with a one-word answer. 

Instead, focus on open-ended questions that encourage more description. These kinds of questions can open up a conversation that lets you learn so much more. So, instead of asking your partner how their day was, ask them about something interesting that happened that day or how something made them feel.

couple sitting by water on top of rocks talking3. Be an Active Listener

Far too often, people make the mistake of thinking communication is only about speaking. But, it could be argued that an even more important part of the communication process is listening. 

No, not just hearing — listening. 

To be an active listener, make sure you’re giving your partner your undivided attention. Use nonverbal cues to let them know you’re listening, like nodding. Ask questions if you need clarification. Repeat certain statements they’ve said if you don’t understand. 

Most importantly, don’t interrupt — especially with personal judgments or opinions. If they want your input, let them ask for it. Active listening is about support. It will help your partner feel heard, understood, and valued. When you choose to be an active listener, your partner is likely to do the same for you.

4. Make Time to Talk

There’s no question that we live in a busy world. Maybe you and your partner both have demanding jobs, or your free time is typically spent taking care of the kids or running errands. 

But, if you want to improve communication in your relationship, you have to make time for it. You have to prioritize it. 

Dedicate some time each day solely to communicating with your partner. Maybe it’s first thing in the morning when you can chat over coffee. Maybe it’s before bed when everything else is quiet. The most important thing is that there are no other distractions and you’re not trying to rush through the conversation. 

Even if you have to schedule date nights or communication times, it’s worth it. It shows your partner that you want to prioritize your relationship, and vice versa. That dedicated communication time will quickly become something you look forward to. 

As you can see, even if you’re currently having communication issues, they don’t have to last forever. Put some of these effective solutions in place, and you might be surprised by how quickly you and your partner grow closer. 

Don’t hesitate to reach out to learn more about the benefits of couples therapy.