Everyone wants to feel like they belong and that they’re accepted. That’s especially true in romantic relationships. It’s important to feel like your partner loves, wants, and accepts you for who you are.
But, if you’re someone who deals with rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD), that need is even greater. You might feel like you’re constantly struggling with negative thoughts about yourself and your role in your relationship. Do you worry that your partner doesn’t really love you? Maybe they’re not attracted to you, or they’re getting ready to leave you at any moment.
Sound familiar?
Rejection-sensitive dysphoria can wreak havoc on an otherwise healthy relationship. But, there are things you can do to handle it and make sure you and your partner remain a united front as you work through it. Let’s cover some strategies that can help.
Prioritize Communication
Open communication is always important in a healthy relationship. But, it becomes even more necessary when you’re struggling with a problem like RSD. It can be tempting to want to sweep your emotions under the rug, but that’s likely to make them worse.
So, open up to your partner about how you’re feeling and the effects of your condition. It might be difficult for them to understand at first, so try to express how it feels, and if certain things tend to trigger you more than others.
You should also communicate about your needs and wants, and the things that help you feel better, especially when you’re feeling rejected.
Keep in mind that it’s just as important to be an active listener to your partner. They might have questions or concerns, and they should have an open platform to discuss those things freely.
Be More Mindful
Mindfulness isn’t a new technique. But, it’s become more popular for people dealing with everything from anxiety and depression to RSD.
Rejection-sensitive dysphoria, much like anxiety, can cause you to focus on the “what ifs” of your relationship. What if you’re not good enough? What if your partner is thinking about leaving you?
When you practice mindfulness, you’ll ground yourself in the present. Those negative thoughts might still try to come, but you can let them pass you by. Instead, focus on what’s around you right now, take a few deep breaths, and you’ll have an easier time managing your emotions at any given moment.
Practice Self-Care
Self-care is necessary for everyone. But, when you regularly have a fear of rejection, it’s even more important. Try to do something each day that boosts your well-being and allows you to feel good about yourself.
That might include some kind of physical activity, reading a good book, writing in a journal, or cooking a healthy meal. Don’t be afraid to get your partner involved in some of these activities, but make sure you’re doing them for yourself and no one else.
Self-care practices can boost your self-esteem and help you realize your worth, especially when it comes to your relationship.
Talk to Someone
Your partner should be the first person you talk to about feelings of rejection in your relationship. You can also lean on your support system if you need to be able to vent about your feelings or try to get different perspectives.
But, one of the best things you can do to combat RSD and help your relationship is to work with a mental health professional. Learning that those did not feel emotionally heard or seen or comforted can lead one to an anxious attachment style is an important awareness.
Couples counseling can help you understand where your RSD may stem from and what triggers it. Starting from the root cause is a great way to initiate the healing process. You’ll learn how to manage your symptoms and eventually overcome the overwhelming fear of rejection that’s causing harm to your relationship. If you’re interested in learning more, contact me today.