Emotionally focused therapy helps couples, families, and individuals foster strong communication and strengthen relationships with each other. It uses scientific backing to help people better understand human bonds and attachments.
EFT also helps people identify emotions and recognize how emotions can impact behaviors. That’s especially true when it comes to the cause and effect of negative emotions.
While EFT is considered a short-term therapy (most people participating in 8-20 sessions), you’ll go through several core principles throughout your journey. Digging into those principles can help you improve your relationships, become more in tune with your own emotions, and even learn about personal attachment issues that could be impacting your interactions with others.
With that in mind, let’s take a closer look at the core principles of emotionally focused individual therapy.
Emotional Awareness
Before focusing on any other principle, you’ll first learn how to be aware of your own emotions. It might sound simple on paper. But you might be surprised by how little you actually observe yourself and your emotions on a regular basis.
Doing so, and keeping a diary of the circumstances surrounding your emotions, can help you better understand where those feelings come from. Perhaps more importantly, it can help you understand the potential consequences of your emotions, and how they’re impacting your life and your relationships.
Emotional Regulation
When you have a greater sense of where your emotions come from and how they’re affecting you, EFT will help you learn how to regulate them.
Being more in tune with your emotions will almost automatically make it easier to stop giving in to feelings that can have negative consequences. Your therapist will help you go one step further by guiding you through healthy coping strategies that will make emotional regulation easier.
That could include anything from journaling to practicing mindfulness and meditation when your emotions start to feel overwhelming.
These coping mechanisms can lead to self-acceptance and build emotional resilience over time.
Attachment Theory
Attachment TheoryIt’s likely that you’ll also cover aspects of attachment theory in EFT, especially if you’re struggling in your everyday relationships. There’s a reason why EFT has become so popular with couples and families. But, it works just as well for individuals who might have trouble getting close to people or communicating effectively.
We all have different attachment styles stemming from childhood. Ideally, everyone would have a secure attachment style. That suggests you came from a stable, loving home where you were given an appropriate amount of attention and care.
Unfortunately, many people deal with anxious or avoidant attachment styles.
Someone with an anxious attachment style might struggle to communicate their needs. They might also act out when something triggers them. That can lead to strained relationships that always feel like they’re on thin ice.
Someone with an avoidant attachment style might actually be fearful in relationships. They can be extremely dependent, or downplay the importance of relationships, altogether.
Keep in mind that these don’t necessarily have to be romantic relationships. Poor attachment styles can impact your connection with family members, friends, and even co-workers.
Is Emotionally Focused Therapy the Right Move for You?
Understanding the core principles of emotionally focused individual therapy can help you come to some big realizations about your emotions and your attachment style. While EFT isn’t right for everyone, it can offer healthy ways of coping with emotions while teaching you how to strengthen the bonds of your relationships, and how to be a better communicator.
If you’re interested in learning more about these principles and how they might benefit you, feel free to contact me for more information or to set up an appointment for EFT.